With a little help from my friend

I've been beating myself up for a long time about not being stimulating enough for Jude. The moment Lilac was born I took one look at him and realised he's a big boy now. 8 months of a rough pregnancy had past and I had somehow missed almost a year of Jude's development by being too sick and exhausted to do anything interesting with him.

Now with a little baby in tow, things have far from improved and I've been really worried for Jude. I've started thinking seriously about a day each week at child care for his enjoyment, but I worry about how to keep him stimulated every day of the week.

So I finally stopped being a martyr and enlisted the help of my better half. Jeremy loves spending time with Jude and has always stepped up to the plate when needed. So naturally he has no objection to being asked for help.

This morning he took Jude to swimming lessons, after years of serious neglect in that field. He has also started taking him to a sing and dance session at the local community centre once a week.

This is what being a family, and being parents, is all about. Sharing the responsibility of raising our children and picking up the slack for each other where the other one struggles.

I admit I have always struggled to make time to get out of the house every day in new and interesting ways, as I often get bogged down in housework and trying to make sure the family is well fed and the children get enough rest during the day.

There is a very delicate balance to being a full time stay at home mum. Some women are super mums who can do everything, but I can't and I'm very glad Jeremy is here to help me.

The Wonder Weeks

A book that is taking the parenting world by storm, The Wonder Weeks, helps parents through those times a baby becomes extra clingy and fussy by explaining they occur due to developmental leaps in the baby's cognitive development. When the baby emerges through the rough patch they have a new skill to show off.

Now, I'm not 100% convinced this book isn't merely yet another money spinner in the vast universe of unnecessary baby paraphernalia, and I haven't personally purchased a copy, but so many people are talking about it I don't need to actually own it.

What I do like about the book, however, is the gentle reminder from time to time that our babies are soft, delicate creatures experiencing new, exciting and difficult challenges constantly with a loooong way to go before they can function even slightly independently. They need from us patience (endless) and understanding.

We, as parents, do find ourselves having days where we just want to scream. The book reminds us also that these times, while testing, are experienced by all parents and, more importantly, do pass... Until a new testing period emerges.

I've lost track of how many weeks old Lilac is, but she's approaching 4 months so around 16 weeks. The Wonder Weeks says there is a change happening now, a big one, and I can assure you Lilac is certainly extra clingy, sleeping poorly and crying more than usual.

The only pro right now is that while I'm holding her to my breast all day, I have a chance to write this blog entry on my phone (the first blog entry in a while).

I wonder if she'll be able to compose her first orchestral piece after this wonder week, or perhaps that change doesn't happen until week 40.